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Perhaps the most important aspect of being your own coach is to do what any outside adviser—or a good parent,for that matter—would preach:practice,practice,practice. Avoid individuals who suck your energy and diminish your confidence. Hang out with the people who see you at your best,and remind you about it every so often. Pessimists drag you down, as do critics. If there J s one winning behavior that people building confidence should model, it' s the willingness to get back into the game after a setback. Don' t nurse your wounds.

There are, however, important warnings. Panicking can compound a small misstep by causing you to lose your head and forget to think clearly. If you suffer a terrible loss, give yourself time to absorb the blow. Don' t deny the hurt or try to solve the problem immediately. Gather your support system around you and simply get nurtured. Sitting around and thinking about your loss is the worst thing you can do to solve your